An opportunity to teach...an opportunity to learn.

I taught the Relief Society lesson this past Sunday. With my calling I have had the opportunity teach every forth month. Each time I teach I get to choose the topic I will teach. Intimidating and fun. The first time I taught was in December so it was easy to find a focus. I spoke on aligning our will with out Heavenly Fathers. It was a huge topic but I remember it going well. Aside from being completely nervous up there. I remember my friend talking to me after, she told me to relax and not be afraid of the quiet moments when no one comments. I hated those moments. The next time I taught I chose to speak on sustaining the Priesthood. This was a fun one to prepare because I elicited the help of the some priesthood holders. I asked them how we as a Relief Society might better sustain them. I also asked them how we can sustain them in the dating world. I got little feedback on the dating part but for the most part they asked us to allow them to serve us. That lesson was a lot of fun to teach. I still remember being very nervous but it was a lighter subject so I could joke around and that always calms me. If I can make people laugh I can relax.
This past Sunday I felt a lot of growth in my teaching and preparation. I always get a head start on picking my topic so I can have as much prep time a possible. I first decided to speak on hope. As I studied my thoughts were 'hope is often misunderstood'. So I thought I will clear things up. Well I now know why it is misunderstood... it is very hard to teach it. I now have a better understanding for myself but I could not put it in words to teach. So I decided to go with the home teaching message in the Ensign on obedience. However, nothing developed out of that topic, except for a love for that article. So what did I teach you ask. I still don't remember the thought that brought me to this decision. I just remember climbing into bed and having some thought so I got up turned my computer back on and read a conference talk. I don't remember which one. Then I decided to read Sister Thompson's talk from the General Relief Society Broadcast titled Mind the Gap. After I read it I thought that is a good talk I will have to look at it again and I went to bed. I thought about it off and on but never really had a chance to sit down and plan anything. One night I mentioned the talk to Monica and told her a few of my thoughts they were redirected as I spoke. Then the Friday night before I spoke I was a little nervous because I had very little time to plan the lesson, between homework and hanging out with a great friend. Again I talked to Monica and the plan just came to me. She must be a saint. So the next day a headache took over my life and I was still nervous as to how I would prepare. Another saint came along and helped me relax and get rid of the headache (they never go away as fast as this one did). I had a two hour window that was completely free to work on the talk. I whipped it out in no time. The spirit is amazing when it floods in like that. I thought I downloaded the talk so I could play part of it during the lesson. Then I went out and enjoyed the rest of my Halloween.
So Sunday morning came early like it always does. All the meetings were wonderful, I have an amazing ward. I started setting up for my lesson and found that I did not actually download the talk and since I did not have Internet I did not have the talk. I ran downstairs and found a guy with an iPhone and and other with speakers they saved me. The lesson went wonderfully. Such great comments when I needed them and I was able to build off their comments. I was not afraid of the quiet pauses and as I waited I got encouraging look. At one point I gave the girls a question and let them discuss it with a neighbor then they shared their ideas with the class. I use to dislike when teachers made us do that but now I will respect it because it helped so much and it took the lesson right where I wanted it to go. I felt very natural up there everything seemed to flow. I love teaching. I look forward to my next chance to teach in March.
So what have I gained from these teaching opportunities. I think I have gained confidence in myself I have become more comfortable with standing in front of the girls. A big factor in that is the relationships I have developed with these girls over the last 14 months. They are such amazing examples to me. They inspire me. I have also learned of the preparation needed to allow for the spirit to guide the work and the effort needs to be there. When the ward first started I was asked to give a lesson at Family Home Evening. I tried and tried to prepare something and nothing came. I was embarrassed and all I could do was bear my testimony. One might argue that is exactly what was needed that nigh,t but I feel more thought and preparation would have helped me produce the lesson requested. (though I learned a lesson that night) The biggest thing I have learned is that our Heavenly Father is aware of each of us and he knows what we needand he knows how to get those things to us. Our Heavenly Father knows what the sisters in the Canyon Rim 5th ward Relief Society need to hear and he just needs someone willing to be an instrument in his hand to present that message. I am grateful that as the teacher I don't have to be the only instrument available, those that share comments come ready to add to the spirit. Together we teach and learn. I always have said I prefer giving a talk because you don't have to rely on comments, slowly my opinion is changing.
Thank you to all those who have supported me in the preparation and presentation of these lessons.